Fortune Cookie

Earlier this week I went out for stir-fry.  After paying my bill, I sipped on my drink as I opened the fortune cookie.  Usually the fortune cookie has something trite and forgettable.  But this one was a little different.

Your fondest dream will come true this year.

This was an interesting fortune, in that it immediately got me thinking.

What is my fondest dream?

I remember when I used to have dreams.  As I got older, the old dreams became impossible and the newer ones seemed to become less important.  I'd have to say it's been at least a decade since I even had a dream - at least one for myself.

What if my fondest dream is for someone else?

Does that count?  What if my fondest dream involves seeing one of my sons realize his fondest dream, or involves me being able to do something really spectacular for my kids?

So I decided to run a little personal exercise.  I've made a list of all the things I can think of that could fall under the category "fondest dream".  I've rated the probability of each dream to which I might be able to make them come true through my own efforts. 

If my fondest dream does come true this year, is it due to the miraculous intervention of this little fortune cookie?  I suppose at the least I would have to credit the fortune cookie with providing the inspiration for me to make the dream come true.

I've found that only those dreams that can be realized through my own focus, dedication, and hard work have a probability above 50 percent.  What the fortune cookie has helped me realize is that to the extent that dreams can come true for anybody, the first step is to define the dream outcome and then create a concrete plan to make it come true.

My policy is to avoid publishing things deeply personal in the blog, so my dreams will never appear here.  But what I have discovered is that dreams fall into two categories: material and spiritual.  Material dreams can be achieved with focus, planning, and hard work.  Spiritual dreams can only be influenced in varying degrees, as they involve the attitudes and willing participation of others.  Material dreams are concrete and definable - you know when you're done.  Spiritual dreams are life-long endeavors, and you never really know for sure when you're done.

Now all I have to do is look at my list and decide:

Do I want this dream to come true badly enough to give the level of commitment it will require?  Even with that focused effort, there's still a pretty good likelihood I'll fail anyway.  Can I deal with that truth, or will it discourage me from maintaining that effort?  If one or more of my fondest dreams come true, will I be deleriously happy or a little disappointed?

I think I know the answers.  If somehow my fondest dreams for others were to come true, I'll be much happier than if the ones for myself came to be.